Fill Me, Lord!

      I am getting more and more revelation concerning the importance of meeting alone with the Lord. He wants each one of the members of His Bride to do this regularly. You could say He wants to increase His intimacy with His Bride in doing this. For you see, when we do, He pours Himself into us, and when this happens our own flesh is edged out of us. As He increases in us (or takes up more space in us, or fills us more fully, you might say) our own self passes away or goes away. Think of yourself as a container which only holds so much. When He increases, the parts of us must dissipate or leave. With the intimacy increasing, when we meet with Him each new day, He occupies more space in us. I am saying this many different ways to create a picture in your mind.
     He wants to take us over, but not in a hostile way at all. No, He knows that the only way we can overcome the things that are pulling on us to succumb to in this world, is to have Him fill our cup with Himself. For you see, it is Him in us which does the overcoming. If all we have is our limited and self-focused flesh or soul to operate from, we are doomed to fail. So His power advancing in us, or our ability to "walk in the Spirit" is directly related to us opening ourselves up each day, or many times throughout the day, to let Him infuse our being. Then, and only then, will He become our all in all in truth.
    Oh, and did I add that during these times of intimacy, we are totally satisfied. We can then see that nothing else we have tried to bring us relieve or fill our needs, whether they be physical, psychological or otherwise, will work. So, we want to then surrender more and more to Him filling us, so that He can take total dominion in and through us. With His life in us, and flowing out of us, He brings life to everything He touches.
    I run to this secret place now because of all of this, and He and I connect with the life of the Father and all is well and complete. "The Lord is My Shepherd; I shall not want," because He fills my every need.

No More "Eating on the Run"

     Last week the Holy Spirit shook up my routine. We were visiting friends out of state, and I found myself in one of their bedrooms, "communing with Christ." Let me explain.
     The lady we stayed with always got alone with the Lord first thing in the morning. So because she did that, I decided to do the same thing. When I sat down on the fouton will my cup of coffee, and "met" with Him, He seemed to say in my spirit, "I'm so glad you came." It was the most lovely and long-overdue meeting. I didn't realize how long, until that moment.
     I have been operating on the basis and belief that because He lives in me, I didn't need to get alone with Him thinking that wouldn't make a difference. Oh, how wrong I was!!!! It is the difference between eating on the run and calmly sitting down to a beautiful banquet; the difference between walking around and swallowing food you don't even taste, and enjoying each succulent bite. The difference between being defeated throughout the day, and seeing Him overcoming through you.
     Now, each morning I meet Him first, to "eat of Him and drink of Him," and oh, what a satisfying meal He is. Whether He serves His love, His Wisdom or His Revelation, each moment with the Bread of Life is fulfilling. Nothing satisfies but Him!!! And it is from the substance of who He is, that all good things in and through me comes. This life I am experiencing in this morning meal does things in me I don't even know about, but I know I am absorbing all the nutrition that is Him in my spirit.
     He bids us to "Come to the Table" and eat. When we do in expectant humility, He serves a meal which will result in us never being the same again. I recommend Him as a 5-star restaurant. Try Him-you'll see.
     



Praying Into

     When we look around at what is happening in the world, our natural man is tempted to want to "do something" and "do it now." We shoot emails informing those who may not know, so they can know. Somehow we think knowledge in and of itself can save the day. It's only normal to try and change things when we see what we have known related to a good life slowly slipping away. Helplessness is a hard pill to swallow. I am convinced, however, that our mostly political actions are of no effect. There is a bigger man behind the curtain than any of our attempts can stand up against, and it seems lately that he is gaining ground.
     So, what should we do? Just sit there and let it happen? No. We pray into all that God stands for despite what is going on. When someone sees evil being done, it is very difficult to turn away from it and not respond. Again, I am suggesting, even imploring God's family to pray for His heart's desire of restoration, salvation, deliverance, cleansing, redemption and completion. Even in the midst of what the enemy is doing, and especially because of what he is doing.
     God's plans and purposes will be done, no doubt about it. Our temptation is to look at the things we can see, and either sin to cope, or put our trust in ourselves, our governments, or other people or things. That has always been the temptation. Even when things were going well in the Garden, the temptation that was met with failure was to live life apart from God. How much more tempting when everything is falling apart.
     When we become more a part of the realm of spirit than of this temporal realm of sight, we will have broken through the veil and be enabled by His power to live a life of true faith. The evil around us will not turn our heads to the right or the left, as we will look squarely into His face and see eternity, and remain undistracted by anything else around us. It is well with my soul. Selah.

Jerusalem

     Jesus said, "I have to go to Jerusalem." When I was thinking about this today, I thought that we all need to eventually go there; more importantly live there now. It is a place of death that leads to life. It is where the firstborn lives; our Elder brother. Mount Zion. Outside the city walls where God restores and completes us. "Come out of her my people" He says as He speaks to those entrenched in Babylon's life. "Come and rest with me awhile. Live where I do. Do what I do. See Me. Know Me. Be made new!  There is  a lot of exciting activity going on that natural eyes can't see, and natural ears can't here."  Yes, we need to run there if we haven't already done so.   

The Reward for Dying

     "Help me learn how to 'die daily' Lord and give me the courage to do it."
       Praying this prayer today upon seeing myself. This is made known by His Word that says if I have jealousies, than I am yet carnal. Another revelation to me is given where He says that if I have fears I am not perfected in love. I also know that these things in me will go as I continue to die to myself.
     Jealousy and fear can be connected in some circumstances, as they are in mine, but I wonder sometimes which one came first the chicken or the egg? Am I jealous because I have fear or fearful because I am jealous? I think that my fear of abandonment and rejection gives rise to my jealousy. In other words when I see something which threatens my sense of security, jealousy arises and sometimes I attack with words to try and stop the threat. Of course, this never works but it only sabotages the desired outcome, (to feel safe) and can even perpetuate feeling more abandoned and rejected. These fleshly emotions of fear and jealousy are truly ones' enemies, and not protectorates as someone may hope. Once this is realized, it even becomes more loathsome when a person sees them operating in oneself; an enemy lurks within and they can't seem to stop it sometimes.
      However, I have seen God at work in me whittling away at these insecurities, and their power is diminishing, and are gradually being replaced by my security in Him, but I want them completely gone!
     This death that I need His courage to face is non-negotiable. As the saying goes, "the only way out is through." I'm not exactly sure how I do that daily, but He is revealing to me more and more of what that entails. It has to do with laying down one's will for another usually, and then death occurs. The reward of all of this is that His nature is then allowed to shine through us as we die. So, it's dying to live essentially, and it comes with a guarantee that enemies will flee when this happens! Would it be a stretch to call it a "mercy killing"? I don't think so, for that is really what it is. His ways are not our ways indeed.  

God's Reconstruction Project

     I thought I'd better post something today for those of you who may be wondering how my pit experience was, and if it ended.
     Well, as usual, it was agonizing. The attacks against my soul were intense. They didn't last as long as I thought they would. I believe with all that is within me, though, that God used them to "work" in me what was needed. I think of 2 words from a song about Christ to describe how I felt during this dark and painful experience: Rejected and Alone.
     Whenever I enter into this dreadful place, it seems like the whole world is against me, with my own nature adding the great "amen," along with the enemy on the sidelines adding his fuel to the fire. That is the Rejection part. The Alone part is that I don't even feel God's presence. Not to even get close to what Christ felt on the cross, but when He said, "My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?" I can identify. And because His Presence isn't felt, it seems like He has said to me, "Sink or Swim." In other words, "you're on your own," even though I know He really isn't saying that.
     I don't understand His ways, but I accept them. I am aware that many Christians would recoil in anger from what I've said and they would retort,  "God's not like that. That's satan!" Regardless of whether it is God or satan, if we are His, He still uses "everything for good." He can turn the darkest moments in our lives, and everything we go through and experience, into the brightest and the best when His hand touches it. And that is what I rely on; the power of His Light dispelling the darkness, and also that He  uses that darkness.
     Yes, He did that for me the other day. I couldn't have stayed in the pit if I had wanted to. You know why? Because God lives in me, and His work goes on to conform me to the image of His Son. His building permit never expires and He never walks off the job. He will complete what He started in me! And with that I say, "Hallelujah!" He tears down and He builds up! It's just the "tearing down" part that hurts, but knowing that it must be so to let the Builder's image arise in me makes it all worthwhile.
    

The Pit of Despair

     I am planning to be depressed. It's better than it sneaking up on me. At least I'll have some sense of control.
     I think I'll get back in bed with my second cup of coffee. Then I'll go over all the things that I am wondering about that I don't understand right now about my life, myself and what God is doing or saying to me, and the direction He is leading me in, if any. You see, that's the problem. I don't know if He is as active in my life as I have thought He was. What if I am just imagining it so as to feel important or to make my life more exciting? I think from these questions and thoughts you can see why I might feel depressed.
     Then there is the problem of me. Who is even bothered by these kinds of things, or ponders them? From the outside looking in, I would determine that I am unstable. At least I am right now, but that can change without my involvement. That is what I call the rescuing nature of God in me. But, am I making that up? You see, I must show up for this planned depression session, so that I can seek God and let Him show or tell me a few things.
     Well, gotta go. My soul is at a crossroads. I need to hear God so He can show me which path to take, because staying in this place just won't do.  

The Releasing of Life

      Do you ever think that you don't have enough love inside of you? Well, guess what? You're wrong. If you have received new Life through Jesus Christ, He dwells in you and He brought His Love with Him, for He is Love. This Love is enough to make you whole and enough to touch and bring healing to those you have contact through you. Of course, it's not your love, but His.
     If we are assessing our own love, we would be correct to think that we don't have enough. We don't have enough, and we don't even have the right kind. Ours is limited, His is not. Ours is self-centered; His is not.
     But, good news-we can release His Love, and in doing so, our love melts like wax. Let God arise and let His enemies' be scattered! Hallelujah!!!
     As we abide in Him, His very life blood flows to our soul and makes gold out of everything in it's path!!! Believe this, Know this, Embrace this!!!
     Isn't it good news that His Light dispels the darkness?  That His Grace offers pardon and release? That His purity makes all things pure that it comes in contact with? That His splendor turns the hearts of men? That His holiness washes away sin? That His Love wins? That love is in you. Let it go, and in doing so you can "stand back and watch the glory of God!"