Wants, Needs, and Sonship
If God is wanting to change destructive behaviors in us, giving us what we want (which we think we need) is not good for us or will not provide a motivation for change, but will enable us to continue in those same behaviors, BUT if He holds back in giving us what we want, it provides the necessary pain and suffering of discipline needed to lead us to repentance and the empowerment for change that He’ll provide, if our hearts are sincere. This discipline also distinguishes us as a beloved son, greatly valued by our Father. God can never be accused of being permissive, enabling, apathetic, distant, or weak when it comes to our care and growth. He will give us what we need, and not what we want. He is conforming us into the image of His first-born Son.