Questions About our Will and Life-Controlling Problems
How far does God go in "influencing our will," or does He? What I mean by this is whenever someone else or ourselves ask God to help us with some life-controlling habit, or to break a stronghold, which requires our self-control, does He press on our will as part of that help, or just leave it alone, and wait for us to release or yield it to Him?
Many years ago, when I prayed for my son's salvation, it seemed impossible in the natural for that to happen, but this didn't prevent me from asking God, and believing Him fully that this would happen, even though my son's will did not seemed to be engaged at all in that direction. Looking back, I guess I could believe this would happen without doubt because 1) God had given me a personal word of His assurance 2) He had given me an accompanying gift of faith to believe it and 3) I knew I was praying in His perfect will that He wanted none to perish, and so I had the equipment I needed to believe strongly in this way.
Sometimes things aren't that easy though. Currently I am praying for someone who has a life-controlling, and now, life-destroying problem. It is killing both her and others who love her. It is very hard to stand by and watch the destruction happening. In my praying for her, I don't have perfect peace and hope that she will overcome her problem. I know she wants to, but I don't know if that is good enough for her to actually do it, if she doesn't completely fall at Jesus' feet in surrender, and look to Him totally for help.
I believe there comes a time and place for someone to do that in a struggle that becomes chronic and defeating, as a result of their own efforts. As others look on, the unbearable part for them is that they cannot do that part for the other one; they must do it themselves. Until then, outsiders who love them must stand by in helplessness waiting and hoping that they will surrender their wills to His.
Waiting in hope, without letting fear, doubt and unbelief grab ahold of you, as you do, is one of the hardest places to be in, in these situations. Our human impulse to rescue wants to kick into high gear. We want to give the right advice that will help someone "see the light," so that they will turn and "be saved" from their misery and despair. We want to pray the "right prayer" on their behalf , so God will hear us and respond, and come to the rescue Himself. Of course, it does require God's intervention for anyone to be delivered, but I am beginning to believe, that if the person themselves does not surrender their will to His in the case of repeated defeat, then He stands by also and waits for them to do so.
And, how much involvement and help does the one on the outside give without enabling someone who has a life-controlling problem? Does it finally need to come down to removing your help, if giving it gets in the way of them surrendering finally to God; to the only One who can truly help them, even if they feel totally abandoned and hurt by you?
These are questions I am having today, and asking God for the answers. I realize that each situation is different, and there are no pat answers, but I believe that there are similar patterns in each scenario, which can be applied wisely in all of them. So, I am earnestly seeking Him.
One more thing I am wondering is this: am I wanting to distance myself from this person because it hurts me too much, and is that selfishness or self-protection, and not love?
Referring to my first question of if God influences our wills, to do His will: I wish He did sometimes "make" us do what He wants. And maybe sometimes He does in a way. Maybe because He knows we honestly want to do His will, that He does enable us to do it, which is a kind of "making" us do it, or more like "causing" us to do it.
However He works in us, I can be assured that He does love my loved one more than I do, and certainly more perfectly and unconditionally. The thing I get concerned about, is will she receive the love He has for her, or will she push it away? That is really the hinge on which deliverance for life-controlling problems lies. I pray she does, and if she does, freedom and new life is on the way! Oh Lord, let it be so. Amen.
Many years ago, when I prayed for my son's salvation, it seemed impossible in the natural for that to happen, but this didn't prevent me from asking God, and believing Him fully that this would happen, even though my son's will did not seemed to be engaged at all in that direction. Looking back, I guess I could believe this would happen without doubt because 1) God had given me a personal word of His assurance 2) He had given me an accompanying gift of faith to believe it and 3) I knew I was praying in His perfect will that He wanted none to perish, and so I had the equipment I needed to believe strongly in this way.
Sometimes things aren't that easy though. Currently I am praying for someone who has a life-controlling, and now, life-destroying problem. It is killing both her and others who love her. It is very hard to stand by and watch the destruction happening. In my praying for her, I don't have perfect peace and hope that she will overcome her problem. I know she wants to, but I don't know if that is good enough for her to actually do it, if she doesn't completely fall at Jesus' feet in surrender, and look to Him totally for help.
I believe there comes a time and place for someone to do that in a struggle that becomes chronic and defeating, as a result of their own efforts. As others look on, the unbearable part for them is that they cannot do that part for the other one; they must do it themselves. Until then, outsiders who love them must stand by in helplessness waiting and hoping that they will surrender their wills to His.
Waiting in hope, without letting fear, doubt and unbelief grab ahold of you, as you do, is one of the hardest places to be in, in these situations. Our human impulse to rescue wants to kick into high gear. We want to give the right advice that will help someone "see the light," so that they will turn and "be saved" from their misery and despair. We want to pray the "right prayer" on their behalf , so God will hear us and respond, and come to the rescue Himself. Of course, it does require God's intervention for anyone to be delivered, but I am beginning to believe, that if the person themselves does not surrender their will to His in the case of repeated defeat, then He stands by also and waits for them to do so.
And, how much involvement and help does the one on the outside give without enabling someone who has a life-controlling problem? Does it finally need to come down to removing your help, if giving it gets in the way of them surrendering finally to God; to the only One who can truly help them, even if they feel totally abandoned and hurt by you?
These are questions I am having today, and asking God for the answers. I realize that each situation is different, and there are no pat answers, but I believe that there are similar patterns in each scenario, which can be applied wisely in all of them. So, I am earnestly seeking Him.
One more thing I am wondering is this: am I wanting to distance myself from this person because it hurts me too much, and is that selfishness or self-protection, and not love?
Referring to my first question of if God influences our wills, to do His will: I wish He did sometimes "make" us do what He wants. And maybe sometimes He does in a way. Maybe because He knows we honestly want to do His will, that He does enable us to do it, which is a kind of "making" us do it, or more like "causing" us to do it.
However He works in us, I can be assured that He does love my loved one more than I do, and certainly more perfectly and unconditionally. The thing I get concerned about, is will she receive the love He has for her, or will she push it away? That is really the hinge on which deliverance for life-controlling problems lies. I pray she does, and if she does, freedom and new life is on the way! Oh Lord, let it be so. Amen.
posted by Patti Blount @ 7:30 AM
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